Narrative

I live in the desert. I'm not proud of it; rather, I can't change it, at least for the time being. Thus, I've grown accustomed to not-really-snowy winters. It's been snowing almost continuously for the past week... and I'm not talking about your normal winter snow - these are huge flakes coming down very fast.  It's very unusual, especially for our parts.

I flat-out refuse to drive my hooptie-beast in this snow. We've had some bad car-ma over the past month, and one of our cars was stolen and demolished, and then the rental caught on fire. Needless to say, I now have reservations about driving in general. (Funny how that happens after a car you're driving catches on fire.) I digress...

This morning, I make my husband drive the kids to school. He insists I come, because he claims to not know the specific classrooms. I don't believe this, but I doubt he'll take the kids unless I go along for the ride. Yipp-ee.

The entire journey is perilous. It begins on our street: the side-roads are never plowed or sanded (I don't even know if the city has a snow plow/sanding budget, or just doesn't care), so we have a foot of snow/ice/snow/ice pack. We slip and slide precariously for the 100-yard area of our block. We're doing 180's, we're sliding sideways... it's obvious that we shouldn't be going anywhere. We finally gain traction, and head off to the school.

The power of positive thinking (and covering my eyes) gets the kids to school safe and sound... and my husband and I continue to our journey home.

He's not a bad driver - he's rather aggressive, but other than that he pretty  much minds his p's and q's. I, on the other hand, am a horrible passenger. I'm a nervous wreck as a passenger of any car, so I'm exponentially so when we're driving on snow/ice. Cars are big metal death machines, especially cars that don't drive well on snow and ice. As for our car? We might as well be on a motorized sled, our car has no snow maneuverability.

Not once, but twice during our 7-block journey home we slid sideways through intersections.... narrowly missing traffic and parked cars. Once, upon turning a corner, we ended up sliding down the street backwards after a spin. After 20 minutes of stressful sliding, we made it back home.

As for my favorite winter activity? Just getting home safe :)

For the top of a scene:

• P.O.V. (From which character’s perspective am I showing this scene?)
• Goal (What is the P.O.V. character hoping to attain upon entering this scene?)
• Opposition (Who or what will prevent the P.O.V. character from attaining his goal?)
• Problem (What is the thing that the opposition does or says to prevent the P.O.V. character from attaining his goal?)
• Complication (In the end, how as the P.O.V. character’s ultimate ambition been further complicated by the Problem?)

Other Notes:

• Characterization markers (Is there an opportunity in the scene for me to embellish characterization through little “markers” or actions that illustrate a character’s personality?)
• Dialogue notes (How can I improve each character’s unique way of speaking so that they seem more realistic and independent from the other speakers?)
• Setting (Can the time/place that the scene is set be altered to better heighten the scene itself?)

From www.plotastic.com/

"In this dirty-minded world, you are either somebody's wife or somebody's whore or fast on your way to becoming one or the other."
- Jenny Fields
The World According to Garp

I've loved The World According to Garp since I was a teenager. Jenny Fields is a feminist to the bone--she wants nothing to do with men, but she wants babies. During her course of duties as a nurse, she nurses many soldiers, some to health and some to death. Because of World War II, many soldiers come in as terminal cases, brain dead and on their deathbed. TS Garp is a terminal case - he's not able to walk or talk, and is slowly regressing to an infant. She chooses Garp as her sperm donor. I would have too.

Jenny Fields, for me, signified the idealism of independence. She needed no one, nothing, to help her in life. She fielded concerns of her parents and brothers with humor.

We received some orange-and-black striped kittens. They were very small, barely weaned from their mother. One kitten was strange, he wouldn't lift his body from the floor when moving, we think his legs are deformed. He hides. The other kitten is normal, loves to run and play, and is mischievous. We prefer the second kitten.

A few months later, we're playing with the cats. They're obviously not domesticated cats, but rather small tigers. Both kittens have come out to play, the one who lies flat to walk still does so, but it doesn't seem so abnormal anymore. He's kind and playful.

I look down. There's a detached claw on the floor. I look for the flat-walking kitten, but he's fine and playing with the children. I find the other kitten, and pick him up. His claws are falling off, his face is in a state of agony. His paw is bleeding, and he gnaws aggressively on my hand.

From Wikipedia:

The Seven Blunders of the World is a list that Mahatma Gandhi gave to his grandson Arun Gandhi, written on a piece of paper, on their final day together, not too long before his assassination.^[1] The seven blunders are:

• Wealth without work
• Pleasure without conscience
• Knowledge without character
• Commerce without morality
• Science without humanity
• Worship without sacrifice
• Politics without principle

This list grew from Gandhi's search for the roots of violence. He called these acts of passive violence. Preventing these is the best way to prevent oneself or one's society from reaching a point of violence.

To this list, Arun Gandhi added an eighth blunder, Rights without responsibilities.

When I eloped at 18 I left everything (everyone) behind and moved 40 miles away. All of my friends, schoolmates, acquaintances, hook-ups -- the whole lot of 'em. It was the only way I saw out of the hell of my existence.

So, after almost a decade, I've decided it's OK to get in touch with my friends from the past. (i.e. my teenage-dom)

I've met a few -- JM is wholly the same little freak he's always been, AS is still acts like a horny teenager - even if he is married with child, MV is distant - I think she associates me with her AV days (rightly so), etc. I've ran into more, but have steered very far away - many of them have had pasts riddled with violence, run-ins with the po-po, and drugs - and I really want none of that. Very sad, when I remember what promise they had.

There was a time when I could go into a coffeeshop and know everyone in there. Hell, we were the whole patronage. 60 kids smushed into 5 booths and two tables - and happy to be there. I still can't go anywhere in this god-forsaken town without knowing someone. Bless-ed be my curse.

Ahh, I digress.

I've recently began trying to find the 'inner circle' - those who I cared about the most. Most know nothing of another, they just share a common bond - me. Will they ever know? Maybe at my funeral.

I think the most startling person I've found is JLH. I think it's great how well we get along - even after all these years.

You know, I'm trying to raise my niece, give her good thoughts and all that jazz. But, it's hard when someone comes into your life, reminding you what you once were. While I wasn't a bad person, per se, I was very... naughty ;)

Like the nekked party, where my friends' mom almost beat the living hell out of me.

Or how everyone slept together.

Or how everyone had sex.

Where were the adults? We were all at MP's house, whose mother was a waitress. She worked all the time.

I wonder what else I'll remember. I'd forgotten so much.

For the past two nights, it's been raining something fierce. The town I live in is in somewhat of a vortex, all weather usually passes us by...  it's beautiful to watch the storms brew on the mountains, then anticipate the weather onslaught and watch the clouds miraculously split and pass the city. This rain makes me feel like real change is coming - I can already see it happening.

I've always been a firm believer in 'manifesting your reality' - although I haven't always chosen to 'live the path,' so to speak, I've always believed in it. I really wanted rain this morning. I received it this evening. I wanted more new clients this month, sales have already increased by 200%. I really, really love self-employment.

 "Be the change you wish to see in the world" ~ Gandhi

I've had... 5 blogs -- all in different areas of the Internet. I tried MySpace, but felt too exposed. I did wordpress (on both my own server and theirs) and wasn't fond of that either. Personal blogs, business blogs, blogs for clients, blah blah blah.  I found LiveJournal while researching the Smashing Pumpkins and billycorgan. After searching around a bit, I think I like it here.... and here I will stay.

As by way of introduction -- I'm a 20-something business owner, mother, and wife - albeit with alternating hesitation of each of these roles. I'm in a desert region of North America, the great US of A. The desert drains on my soul, having grown up in Northern California the extreme heat and lack of humidity wears on my psyche. i will, eventually, move to a distant place, where the water will be plentiful and the climate more suited to me. Until then, I wait.

More to come...

~E